Just a Jealous Guy
Posted: Tuesday, March 23, 2010
by Jack H. Schick
I guess I'm one of those selfish guys. I like to have a lot of stuff. I'm not rich, so I never seem to be able to get a lot of the stuff I want. I'm a jealous guy, too. My neighbor has a real nice house and lots of expensive stuff. I don't covet it. I don't wish I had it and he didn't. I just want the same stuff he has. Sometimes I'm a little ashamed, too. My car has dents and makes funny noises. The neighbor has a nice new one. I wanted to put up a fence and a bird bath, like he did; but, I had to spend the money on a new roof instead.
I heard somebody on the radio the other day who, at first I though was nuts; but, after listening and thinking it over a while I started to wonder. She was all giddy about the Health Care Bill. She thought health care was a right of the American people. She argued that in order to have our inalienable right of Life, we had to have health care to keep us alive. She said that in order to have the Liberty to do things we were at liberty to do, we had to have health care so we were healthy enough to do them. In order to Pursue Happiness, we had to have health care so we weren't too sick to be happy. I guess it makes sense.
The host of the show asked her some questions. "Is food a right?" "Yes," she said. "Is shelter a right?" "Yes," she said. "Is having a job a right?" She said that everyone should have access to a good paying job. "Is transportation a right, to get to that job?" She thought a bit, she said that we already have public transportation, so yes, transportation to a job is a right, too. If not actually there, it's insinuated in the Constitution, she claims. Maybe, I'm not sure yet.
"Who's going to pay for it?" the host asked. "We will, with our taxes," she said. When it was suggested that the country is already broke, she suggested that we tax The Rich and Companies more because they have too much money already and should pay their fair share. When she was asked, who would see to it that everybody had food, shelter, a job and transportation, she answered "The Government." I was expecting that one.
At first, I scoffed, "The same old ridiculous, Marxist, Fascist crap!" Then I pulled onto my street. The neighbor had his ATV out working on it. I could see the snowmobile in the back of his huge garage. His son was using the leaf blower to clean out around the central air conditioning unit in the gorgeous garden at the side of the house. I pulled into my parking spot on the street and saw the lawn rake leaning against my beat up window A/C unit that doesn't work anymore. I started to wonder about what the woman had said.
At work, there is talk about dropping health insurance, since it will be less expensive to pay the penalty for not having it than it is to provide it. There is a tax credit for providing it, but it doesn't compare to the savings. There would be some pool or a government policy I could buy for myself. The company would save a lot of money and could use it to give me a better raise. I wouldn't have to pay the extra tax on my "Cadillac" plan I now have. I could use my raise to by health insurance.
If the Government provided food, they'd probably give everybody the same amount. If they did, there would be no starving people, but there also would be no fat people, either. I know I could sure use somebody to limit how much I eat. That would save a lot of money on food production and on health care. They wouldn't have to make so many different sizes of cloths, either. They'd have to have some measurement standard, or Mary Lou Reton would be getting too much and Sahquille O'Neal not enough. I'm sure they'd figure it out in some fair way.
If the Government provided everybody with shelter, I'm guessing there would be mass produced identical houses. That would really save a lot of money. For one thing, there wouldn't be the 'keep up with Jones's' problem. You might have some people spiff up their place to embarrass the neighbors, but it wouldn't be as blatant as building a big place and filling it with nice stuff, like my neighbor did. If all the houses were alike, it would be less expensive to repair. All the people would need the same parts, the same size doors, the same faucet repair kits. The stuff could be cheaply mass produced.
If everybody was provided a good paying job, the Government income would go up. Half the people don't pay taxes right now. If they just said that everybody was going to get $100,000 a year, and 50% was going to be paid in taxes, we could start paying off the national debt. There would be a lot less stress, too. People wouldn't work extra jobs and people wouldn't have to invest in risky things, like stocks or inventions trying to get rich.
The transportation thing sounds good too. I'm going to have to get another car soon. It gets good gas mileage, but it's all dented, and rattles. It makes a funny noise when I turn corners. I hate it when people stare at me when I drive by. When I accelerate, the smoke obscures my view in the mirror. Again, I'm sure if they gave us cars they'd all be the same. Repairs would be a lot cheaper because the parts would all be the same. If they put a bus or train route though here, heck, I'd start using it tomorrow and leave my bomb parked.
It's starting to make some sense. I've decided that I've got to keep an open mind about this stuff. I'd feel a lot better if I had the same things everybody else had. I'll have to think about it more and see if I can get on the same band wagon the woman on the radio was on. Equality for all, that's the American Way ! At least I think so.
But for now, I've got to go rake leaves. That leaf blower noise is like him thumbing his nose at me. I'm embarrassed and jealous. The neighbor's place is really looking good this year. I'm not sure, if they gave us all a house would it look more like his or more like mine? Probably neither. I might be talked into giving it a try. They'd have to knock down everything we've built first, and start over. I think they've got a good start on that.
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More commentsIt's cool to get into the head of the modern Zeitgeist, especially your demographic, Jack. But being a part of the picture, from where I am sitting , you don't demonstrate an ability to look outside of yourself or your own situation.Look back to the mid 1950's and 1960's, the era when I came into the world, and how it was for my parents and most middle class Americans. They practically did all have the same stuff. The tract suburban houses in southern California were practically identical. Dad had an easy time getting jobs at wherever (my favorite place was when he worked at Disneyland in Anaheim). Mom worked for the people that made the space capsules that went to the moon. I even got to walk through one of them, and get autographs by astronauts and test pilots when I was a boy. Those were happy days, just like the TV show starring Ron Howard.What you are describing is an aberration of affluence. Leaf blowers? There is no end to the rat race you are caught in. But it's worse than that, because that level of gentrification is hurting people, the people you don't get to see outside of your neighborhood. Chances are, those were once the people who did live in your neighborhood, until upscale development drove them out.What am I driving at? That there is a causal connection between the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. To say that the 10% unemployed are there because they are too lazy to go out and look for work is just an upper middle-class fantasy. We are talking about people who did work until they got permanently let go. So, what's the difference between then and now? They were hard working, but the next day they were suddenly lazy? No, that's not it.Back in those days of same looking houses and only one flavor of Doritos rather than 16, people were happy because they had what they needed, what they wanted, and didn't know or care that you could flavor a potato chip 16 different ways. But now you know, and you aren't content.Where is all that wealth going? It's not all going to the government. It's locked up at the upper socio-economic levels, where it remains largely and cumulatively inaccessible to those poor, good for nothing slugs below, like me.
Do I envy your story? Sure I do. But more as a fantasy of what used to be possible, but is becoming increasingly improbable. What will happen then, Jack, to break up the stale mate? I'm afraid it's going to have to be the government. The government or you, which is it? We're running out of air down here, and we want an answer pretty quick.Just an article. I'm a conservative Quaker who likes to write funny stuff some time. When I hav emore time I'll read your comment again and get to the bottom of it. Thanks for reading and commenting.I've re-read and thought about your comment. I don't think you understand me at all, if you think much of what I write is my strict point-of-view. I choose to not really display it in my articles. I write to entertain and to spark thinking in the reader. Your comment shows that I am partly successful. I appreciate "listening" to you. I choose to make no comment on your point-of-view. Thanks for continuing to read and comment on my stuff. jack
Ahem.... love the tongue in cheek and you pose some interesting observations - we need some answers, don't we?Thanks for being a steady reader-I'm one of yours too. I've been busy with historicla research and decided it was time for another one. believe it or not- I wrote it on my lunch breat today.
keep your focus and you'll be okIt sure seems hard to not appear as the character in my articles. Sarcasm often seems to blow righ by people.
Loved this! But does this mean everyone starts to think and act the same as well?It's basically a satire on the administration. I'm a States Rights, individual liberty,individual responsibility guy. I'm a conservative Quaker.Think 1984 or Johnathan Swift. Few people seem to get it when I do these kind of essays. I appreciate you reading and commenting on my articles.
Reader's Club, this time, Jack. Still loved it!Thanks again, Lorrie- check out Willa's Ghost and tell me what it needs
Great article Jack very funny and interesting.Thanks for reading and commenting
I thoroughly enjoyed your thoughts. Question? If you got all your neighbor's "stuff" you might then be richer, and have to live in a new neighborhood. Would you be okay raking a larger lawn of leaves?I'd rather be in the hovel in the woods somewhere with a bicycle.Thanks for reading and commenting. I hope you get the last 2 sentences.
This is not like other articles I have read. Quirky but very interesting, and you put your point of view across in a great way. Well done! I enjoyed reading you article.Thanks fro reading and commenting
Jack, you have done it again. Thanks.Thanks, Bob. I enjoy writing them. They just pop out.
Jack,Nice article, but reality is something else. We just need to focus in our own priorities.Thank you,thanks for reading
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