Winter Weather: Automobile Problems
Posted: Saturday, January 29, 2011
by Jack H. Schick
I had to dig my wife’s car out again this morning. After last week’s storm, when it had been sitting there in a snow drift for almost a week, I had to jump her battery first, then dig her out. I told her to drive it around a while to charge it up. She turned on the heater, the wipers, the CD player and just drove it a couple miles out town to get milk and back. She said she'd left it running in the parking lot to let it charge up, but the next day the battery was dead again, not to my surprise. I cleaned up the terminals, put a new end on one cable, and jumped started it. When she got home from that charge-up trip, she shut it off, but restarted it a couple times to make sure it was good--and sapped as many amps out of it as she could before leaving it sit out in the cold all night. Then we got this last, big snow. I finally got around to digging it out this morning. The battery is dead again, naturally. “Maybe it needs a new one,” she said. I just bought it last summer after she left interior lights on all weekend and killed the old one for good. When I get it running and dug out, I might just drive up to Pep Boys and turn it in for warranty replacement anyway. It’s had a rough six months.
Sometimes it’s not hers or the car’s fault. If the air gage had been working right at the gas station she would have seen that she'd put 95 pounds in the one tire and twelve pounds in the other (“The steering seems funny”). If the truck that was parked there wasn’t so big, and the parking meter so close to the curb, nothing would have happened (“I don't know why they don't have diagonal parking there”). If that woman hadn’t stopped so quick, we wouldn’t have needed a new headlight. If that guy had blown his horn, we wouldn’t have needed a new tail light.
While I was taking a break from shoveling her out (I got a pain in my chest, felt a little dizzy, and saw bright spots flashing before my eyes), I started thinking about an episode she had one winter when we were living out in Wyoming. They don’t get as much snow out there as here in Pennsylvania, but their winters can be rough, too. Believe me. Automobile problems seem to follow her no matter where we live.
I was working night shift that week and got home about 7:30 am. We lived out in the country, maybe half a mile off the paved road. We still had deep snow cover, but there had been a Chinook wind the day before and everything had gotten wet and muddy. It got cold again overnight and it was all refrozen. When I got to the house she was standing out in the driveway with the kids. The battery in her car was dead and she had to quick get them to the bus stop. I gave her my keys. While she was gone I checked out the car. There was some juice, so all it needed was a jump.
I needed to get to bed, but wanted to get her car running first. It seemed to be taking her forever. I saw the bus heading into town when it topped the one hill over toward the highway and wondered why she wasn’t back yet. Finally, there she came, walking up the middle of the road with that angry look on her face that she gets.
“The truck got stuck,” she said when she got in the house. (Not, “I got the truck stuck.” It had apparently, somehow gotten stuck by itself).
I hiked down to the bus stop to see what I could do. The truck was off the left side of the road, tilted nearly 45 degrees having broken through the ice on what had been a knee deep mud hole the day before. Why she was driving on the shoulder, one wheel in the ditch, on the wrong side of the road, I couldn’t guess. I had to climb up and get in the passenger side. There was icy, muddy water covering half the driver side floor mat it was in so deep. It was high-centered and the wheels just spun. A buddy of mine happened to come past. I got soaked in the icy water hooking up the tow rope; and, he had to drag me ten yards, scraping along to the end of the mud hole before I popped out, but I got home okay.
I didn’t bother asking her what happened. I was tired. I jumped started her car and got ready for bed. I hadn’t gotten my pants off yet when she came storming back in the front door. She said, angrily, as though the car had done it to her on purpose, “Now, the car got stuck!” She’d cut the corner too close and was hung up on a snow bank by the front gate. It wasn't charged up yet and she'd shut off the engine, so I had to jump start it again first, then, with a little shoveling and a push she was off to town. I was off to bed.
It was almost dark when I got up (I’d gotten to bed a little later than expected). When I came out of the bathroom she called in from the kitchen, “Don’t worry, Triple A is on the way!”
“What now?” I was still a little groggy and wandered out and poured a cup of coffee.
“The car’s dead again, I forgot to turn the lights off, and the truck got stuck again," she said, without blinking an eye
I groaned and looked out the front window. Finding the car dead again, she took my truck to pick up the kids at the bus stop. From what I could tell, she backed out through the gate too fast, skidded across the white-packed road and plowed down into the snow drifted barrow pit almost up against the neighbor’s fence. It was in up over the back bumper. The neighbor had to bring the kids home. Triple A was on the way, so I didn’t worry about it. I just quietly sat down to watch re-runs of I Love Lucy. They make a lot more sense than the real world, sometimes. I wasn't complaining, I was simply stating facts when I muttered, “You’ve had five car disasters in less than ten hours,” but it still ticked her off.
“It wasn’t my fault! It’s those stupid snow drifts, and this stupid winter weather! Why can’t we move into town?”
Triple A got there in about an hour. I didn't even bother going outside. They were getting paid for it.
She' hounding me to go out and get her car going now. I have to do a little more shoveling to get into the trunk to get her snow boots out, first. Why they are still in the trunk the way this winter has been, I can’t guess. I still see a few sparkly spots on the perifery of my vision, but the pain in my chest is pretty much gone. There’s just a sensation of tightness. But now, my left arm is tingly and numb. They say we’re going to get another big snow storm Tuesday.
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)Very entertaining, Jack! I like your wife, she's got the right attitude!! Feel better yet? :)Thanks for reading and commenting. I feel fine- have a season pass to the ski area- a great year for it
This had me laughing out loud. I can imagine your frustration. But I can imagine your wife's as well!
I love how she says, The truck got stuck. Like it just happened. Too funny. Take it easy with the shovelling Jack. Good story!Thanks so much for reading and commenting, Brianna (I love that name).
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