Jack H. Schick

Election Fraud in Connecticut?



Posted: Thursday, November 24, 2011

by Jack H. Schick

I have a weird dyslexia. Well, maybe it’s not dyslexia; it’s not a reading disorder, it’s a writing disorder.  I mix up B’s and P’s. I don’t know how many times I’ve written things like “rebuplic” instead of “republic.” I first noticed the problem when I was in junior high school. I figured, since a small case b and p are really just upside-down inverses of each other, it sort of made sense. It was a mechanical malfunction. My pen made the loop under the line instead of over, or vice versa.  I got a little more concerned when I found myself doing the same thing on a typewriter. A B is typed with the left hand index finger and the P with the right hand pinkie. That’s a brain problem, not a mechanical problem. I can’t really claim it’s a “typo” when I spell 'people'; 'beoble', can I?

An odd thing happened in a creative writing class at college, once. We were reading some hand written examples of something or other that the professor brought in. I don’t remember what it was about, but the writer did the same thing throughout his paper: reversed the B’s and P’s. I didn’t even notice it at first, of course. The prof pointed it out. The ‘examples’ were done by Amish students from Lancaster County. He said it must be an Amish thing, because several different students mixed up the B’s and P’s. I’m not Amish, though.

I got thinking about my broplem, I mean problem, when I read an article in the newspaper this morning. In Derby, Connecticut, they made a “typo” on an election ballot. 72 year old James R. Butler was running for the Board of Apportionment and Taxation, which monitors the town’s finances. He is a popular Democrat and was a sure-in, nominee.

When the votes were counted, sure enough, James Butler was a winner. He was the highest vote-getter for the ten member Board, with 1,526 “yeas.” There was a big problem, though. There was a “typo” on the ballot (or was it?). James J. Butler was the man who was elected--James R. Butler’s son!  Unfortunately the 46 year old is not the least bit interested in the job.

Everybody knows who actually won the election. They didn’t even notice the middle initial when they cast their ballots. They wanted the ‘old man’ in there to help straighten out their fiscal mess. They figure that since James-the-younger never filed the paperwork and certainly wasn’t his party’s choice, his election is invalid. “Not so!” says Av Harris, spokesperson for the secretary of state’s office. “James J. Butler should be sworn in.” It’s no different than a ‘write-in’ candidate winning. He was ‘officially’ elected.

They've got a real mess on their hands. I wonder if it really was a “typo.” An R and a J are keyed in with different fingers on different hands. It seems too improbable. I wonder if there is a deeper, more sinister plot going on here. Some citizens are calling for an investigation by the election board. They suspect that the Anarchists or the Rebuplicans are behind it.
This Article has been viewed 253 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
No comments yet.
We want your comments! If you can read this, you don't have javascript enabled, so you can't use this comment system. Please enable javascript.